Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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