that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
