you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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