He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Randomize
