obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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