New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Why are your pants in the freezer?
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize