He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
