I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
