I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
this is an emotional support booty call
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
