So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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