the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
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I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
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I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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