I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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