Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
