This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
