glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
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