I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
this just has baby written all over it
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
