I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
