why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
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I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
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Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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