sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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