i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
