Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
