I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
