question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
