Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
