Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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