she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Randomize
