I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize