i think i have two assholes
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Randomize
