So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
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