Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
