There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
only if we run a train.
done.
Girls should come with a carfax report
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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