Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
