the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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