I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
