Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
