i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
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