please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
