So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
