The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
