I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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