I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
