We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
