dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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