I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
