Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Randomize
