youre lurking in front of me
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
how drunk are you?
Several
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
