doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
