So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize