So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Randomize