My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I enjoy the company of your penis
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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