Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
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He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the liver wants what the liver wants
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Just puked most of my soul out..
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